Mothers Group Reflection #47: Like Lukewarm Coffee

There's a favorite scene of mine in a move I love, entitled War Room. The elderly Miss Clara invites her young realtor, Elizabeth, to share a cup of coffee as they discuss the asking price for Miss Clara's home. The conversation quickly turns to matters of faith and to questions about the current state of Elizabeth's relationship with God. Miss Clara places a cup of coffee before her new young friend, and as the two are talking, Elizabeth takes a sip and just about gags on it, much NOT to the surprise of Miss Clara, her hostess. As Miss Clara explains it, no one likes a lukewarm cup of coffee and neither does God like a lukewarm relationship with us. I invite you to take a quick look at the scene for yourself...https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6jfOQ4-whSI

So, have you ever been in one of those relationships with someone who continually finds fault with you, never apologizes and every conversation is one-sided, and you're always the one making all the plans, if they even have time for you at all? I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that those relationships didn't last very long in your own lives.

I reread a quote by St. Faustina this past week in which Jesus told her that what caused Him the most loathing in the Garden of Olives was actually the lukewarm souls. There is nothing more painful in this lifetime than loving someone dearly, and knowing that you are just taking up space in their book. I've heard before that the opposite of love is not actually hatred, but tepidity. At least if we hate, there is an energy there that can be rechanneled in another direction at some point. But when there is total apathy, there is not much left to work with. Thus, we are given several warnings in the Scriptures to wake, be alert and repent. And I don't think there is any single message more important right now than this. This and the reminder to return to our first love, and to do the things we did at first. For converts this will be easy to remember. For those of you who have had a lifelong relationship with Jesus, maybe you can recall some moments of particular consolation or grace, where God's presence was very real to you.

God addresses this phenomenon in Revelation 3:14-22 NRSVCE:

"And to the angel of the church of Laodicea write: The words of the Amen, the faithful and true witness, the original of God's creation: 'I know your works; you are neither cold nor hot. I wish that you were cold or hot. So, because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I am about to spit you out of my mouth. For you say, 'I am rich, I have prospered, and I need nothing.' You do not realize that you are wretched, pitiable, poor, blind, and naked. Therefore I counsel you to buy from me gold refined by fire so that you may be rich; and white robes to clothe you and to keep the shame of your nakedness from being seen; and salve to anoint your eyes so that you may see. I reprove and discipline those whom I love. Be earnest, therefore, and repent. Listen! I am standing at the door, knocking; if you hear my voice and open the door, I will come in to you and eat with you, and you with me. To the one who conquers I will give a place with me on my throne, just as I myself conquered and sat down with my Father on his throne. Let anyone who has an ear listen to what the Spirit is saying to the churches." 

Jumping back to the warning to another church in Revelation 2 for just a moment, this thought goes on to address not just those that are overly busy, but also those who are doing what is good in God's sight, but with wrong motives. To the church in Ephesus it is said,

"I know your works, your toil and your patient endurance. I know that you cannot tolerate evildoers; you have tested those who claim to be apostles but are not, and have found them to be false. I also know that you are enduring patiently and bearing up for the sake of my name, and that you have not grown weary. But I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first. Remember then from what you have fallen; repent, and do the works you did at first." - Revelation 2:2-5a NRSVCE

If we aren't careful and we allow the busyness of life to just sweep us along, we run the risk of missing God entirely. But how do we begin again to talk to Him if it has been a little while? What about those among us who may be struggling to even begin to talk to Him?

For starters, I would offer up the opposite advice of the lukewarm friend...remembering the little things. When we talk to God, we are talking to our very best of friends and the best of fathers. How would we talk to one of those? We would most likely assume the best of intentions or get to know those people better just by doing things together, by inviting their presence along with us as we go about daily activities. We would be careful to pause in the conversation to hear from them, too, because we truly value their input and ideas and life experiences. We would make time with them a priority in our schedule, maybe even scheduling certain times in the day or week to be in their presence without interruptions. Contrary to popular belief, God seems pretty easy to please. He just asks us to show up with an open heart and to let Him walk the journey with us, guiding us and helping us to bear our burdens along the way. Will life be hard at times? Absolutely! Will He discipline us at times? You bet! Will we still suffer in life at times? Yes! But He promises that we will never go through any of these things alone or without His support and grace to bear up under it all (Matthew 11:28-30, Deuteronomy 31:6). He does everything possible to the point of giving His Son on the cross in order to make a relationship with each one of us possible.

I invite you to take a look at the Catechism for more ideas on prayer this week. There are many great resources on prayer, including books, websites, etc. We have discussed various forms of digging into the Bible over time, but I have also found that the Catechism is an excellent resource for growing our prayer life. The entire Part 4 of the Catechism is dedicated to prayer, beginning with article 2558. As it says in CCC2559-CCC2560, "humility is the foundation of prayer. Only when we humbly acknowledge that 'we do not know how to pray as we ought,' are we ready to receive freely the gift of prayer. 'Man is a beggar before God.' If you knew the gift of God! The wonder of prayer is revealed beside the well where we come seeking water: there, Christ comes to meet every human being. It is he who first seeks us and asks us for a drink. Jesus thirsts; his asking arises from the depths of God's desire for us. Whether we realize it or not, prayer is the encounter of God's thirst with ours. God thirsts that we may thirst for Him." 

Questions for further reflection: 
What does your prayer life look like at present? Would you say you're hot, cold, or somewhere in between? I invite you to carve out some time this week to simply ask God what He thinks of your relationship with Him, and then take some time to listen for the answer. Maybe use this question as a journal prompt for the week ahead and jot down any inspirations that come to you along the way.




Photo Credit: Kristin Hardwick, StockSnap.io